Breakfast Links: McDonald’s France Debuts This Weird Thing As Mascot, Calls It ‘Happy’ Out of Spite

Here’s Happy, McDonald’s Infuriatingly Ugly New Mascot (Grub Street)
Clap along if you feel like you want to kick this thing in the mouth.

Burger King Scrapping ‘Have It Your Way’ Slogan (AP)
Instead of that boring, old-fashioned slogan championing perfectionism, the new slogan, “Be Your Way,” will make people stand up for themselves and express their unique personalities…by consuming a burger from a multinational corporation whose fries suck.

15-year-old chef scores VIP reservations at his restaurant (New York Post)
Flynn McGarry’s getting the best chefs in the world to eat at his restaurants. Meanwhile, we ate Wheaties out of a paper bowl and remembered to brush our teeth this morning, so we feel equally accomplished.

RIP Hot Doug’s: A Love Letter (Serious Eats)
NOOOOOOOOOOOO WHY ARE YOU LEAVING US, YOU BEAUTIFUL HOT DOG STAND, NOOOOOO.

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