Ho Ho Ho? Fox & Friends ‘Santa’ Turns Out To Be Quite The ‘Dirty Old Man’ And ‘Pleaser Of Women’

Andrew KirellDec 21st, 2012, 3:46 pm
 

Yesterday morning Fox & Friends interviewed a man dressed as Santa Claus to ask for his feelings about the so-called “War on Christmas” that many conservative commentators believe is being waged by “secular America.” Turns out, the portly man in the red suit, Sal Lizard, is quite the horn-dog and self-described “dirty old man.”

Lizard is a professional Claus impersonator, and he’s written a book called Being Santa Claus to attest to his uncanny resemblance to the popular fictional Christmas character.

But a little digging on YouTube for videos featuring Lizard out-of-character yields a whole lot of lady-loving and dirty-mouth-having. The bloggers over at Douchechillz unearthed a bunch of the videos and parsed them for little lovable nuggets like:

  • “My name is Sal Lizard. I’m an actor, stand-up comic, and pleaser of women.”
  • “You know why it’s important for gals to leave Santa cookies? Because if they don’t, I’ma lick their pie.”
  • “When you’re an old man, you appreciate young girls, if you know what I mean.”
  • “If any of you gals out there want to sit on my lap, I’ll be there for you.”
  • “[Porn legend] Ron Jeremy said to me… ‘You’re a fucking genius … You’ve legitimized Santa being a dirty old man.’ And he said, ‘I always see you with these women, and you’re biting their necks, and you’re licking their necks, or you’re bitin’ them on the boob.'”

    • Watch a mash-up that Douchechillz made of Lizard’s wholesome Fox & Friends with his pervy old man YouTube clips, below:


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