Mayor de Blasio to Stop Ebola Spread with Dramatically-Staged Photos

In the midst of a city verging on Ebola hysteria, one man stands tall. Really tall. And he’ll reassure people with overly dramatic, staged photos of him talking to the nation’s commander at night.

President @BarackObama called last night to recognize our city’s extensive preparations for an Ebola case. pic.twitter.com/Yrxk5O349B

— Bill de Blasio (@BilldeBlasio) October 24, 2014

EXT. – NYC Street – Night

The weather is dark, grim. The cold rain has stopped, leaving the city crisp. Think David Fincher. Like, really David Fincheresque. A man in a trench coat walks into the night with a cell phone.

MAN: Mr. President?

He turns to face the camera. It’s Mayor Bill DeBlasio, whose breath condenses in the air.

MAYOR: We’ve got it handled. Don’t worry about a thing.

He turns to walk into the night, and cue:

[Image via Mayor Bill DeBlasio/Twitter]

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>> Follow Tina Nguyen (@Tina_Nguyen) on Twitter

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