Journalists, they’re just like us! Every dropped call and frustrating reception debacle we laypeople have experienced in our lives is greatly put into perspective by this news report on CNN today, where what initially seemed to be a delay and, later, possibly reception loss tore anchor and journalist apart for what seems on screen to be a few slight moments but probably felt like forever for anchor Joe Johns and adrift reporter Joe Carter.

Late Night host Jimmy Fallon had Tiger Woods as a guest Wednesday night, opening the show with a friendly, “it’s been a year and a half since you’ve been on our show. Whadya been up to?” Woods smiled and said, “Uh, nothing, nothing. Playing bad golf.”

Woods, who’s been struggling to return to form after the sex scandal that rocked his marriage and his career, got a big thank you from Fallon on behalf of his writers, saying the jokes about Woods wrote themselves:

In a controversy that is shaking the Twitterverse, Indonesian information minister Tifatul Sembiring claims that he was forced into shaking hands with First Lady Michelle Obama. Responding to taunts on Twitter (Twaunts?) that he violated his code of avoiding contact with women to whom he is not related, Sembiring told his followers “”I tried to prevent (being touched) with my hands but Mrs. Michelle held her hands too far toward me (so) we touched.”

Luckily, the Associated Press caught the First Lady’s salutory siege on video. Did Sembiring try to fend off the greeting, or is this just so much hand jive? (h/t Alan Colmes)

Tiger Woods is speaking publicly about his divorce following this morning’s news that his now ex-wife Elin Nordegren has provided and exclusive to People magazine. Woods revealed in a press conference earlier today that his maritial troubles have “a lot more difficult than I was letting on” and that ““I wish her the best in everything..it’s a sad time in our lives.”

With her divorce finalized, Elin Nordegren, Tiger Woods‘ ex-wife, is speaking out for the first (and what she says may be the last) time.

People magazine landed the exclusive, but is saving most of the juicy details for readers of the print edition. However all the network morning shows got a preview, and filed detailed reports this morning.

Elin Nordegren and Tiger Woods have finalized their divorce. According to TMZ the two reached a settlement in early July and Elin would like to revert to her maiden name. According to the site Elin is set to receive $100 million and it sounds like they will share custody of the children, though the details of the settlement have not yet been made public.

When you think of alleged Tiger Woods mistresses (all 14+), Donald Trump isn’t exactly the next thing that comes to mind. And yet, low and behold, there is a connection! Today, alleged mistress and Extra special nightlife correspondent Rachel Uchitel has confirmed to Gossip Cop that she received a personal invitation from Mr. Trump to appear on the next season of Celebrity Apprentice and, pending a final okay from NBC, will accept.

On the occasion of Mediaite’s year anniversary earlier this week, some of our staff members and contributors look back on what kind of crazy, weirdo year it was. There are two versions of the story about the last months of the life and times of Eldrick “Tiger” Woods. There’s the sports story, of course, but [...]

Our friends at Gossip Cop our now reporting the breaking news that Elin Nordegren will be receiving $100 million in her divorce from Tiger Woods. Whoa. That is a whole lot of Nike money.

It figures that a story showcasing exactly why TMZ would branch into sports gossip would be broken by…TMZ Sports. The outlet recently reported that the divorce of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren, long thought inevitable since Woods’ many, many infidelities came to light, is officially in the works.

It was a hole in one…twenty-one for Tiger Woods, according to the National Enquirer.

The newly-respectable news organization reports Woods admitted to 121 affairs during his marriage, but the one that sealed the divorce fate was when it got personal.

Writing yesterday morning at Huffington Post (before Ben Roehtlisberger’s six-game suspension was announced), Dexter Rogers shared a lengthy collection of his thoughts about the way the media covered the sexual assault accusations against to the Pittsburgh Steelers’ quarterback. He looked at the scenario from the lens of recent situations across both the NFL and sports world. He’s justified in his attempt: it’s safe to say, for some time to come, that many writers will look at the transgressions of every athlete in comparison to Tiger Woods

Who: Brian Williams, interviewed by Jeff Greenfield
What: “In the News with Jeff Greenfield – Brian Williams”
Where: 92^nd St. Y
When: April 18, 2010
Thumbs: Up

You mean you didn’t get enough Tiger Woods during the last two weeks leading up to Phil Mickelson’s winning Masters? Don’t worry – the circus will be back in just two short months for the next Golf major. This time? Destination: California. According to the Monterey Herald, Tiger has formally filed his application for this year’s 110th U.S. Open at the picturesque Pebble Beach Golf Links on the Monterey Peninsula.

Usually the final-round of a golf tournament provides answers to the sorts of unsettling issues that plague sports fans all year long: Who was the best player that week? How did he hit that shot? Did he really wear that hideous shirt?

But less than 24 hours after Phil Mickelson’s emotional win at The Masters, we’re left to ponder more questions than ever.

The Master’s is over, and in the event that you are just awaking from a six-month coma, you may need to catch up a bit on the Tiger Woods‘ saga. And apart from working blue on occasion, Woods’ play was a perfect redemptive story for sports writers and pop culture obsessives to fetishize over. But the big winner was Phil Mickelson, and in case you didn’t know it, the media really wanted to play-up the stark difference between faithful Phil (whose wife Amy suffers from breast cancer) and the caddish Tiger Woods.

Apparently, post his break-up to Jenny McCarthy, Jim Carrey has a lot of time to weigh in on other people’s relationships…140 characters at a time. It’s unclear whether Carrey is more interested in being the 2.0 Oprah or looking for some sort of social media position on ESPN but here’s what he had to say on his Twitter account re Tiger’s comeback, Elin’s naivete and why every wife should apparently direct their husbands towards a career in curling.

American hero Tiger Woods is back to doing the one thing no one can question his ability to do– playing golf at the 2010 Masters Tournament. So, of course, this is the one time he decides to publicly tell himself what the entire nation has been telling him for the past five months. Just to make it clear he is talking to himself, he goes out of his way to specify that he is, in fact, “Tiger Woods.”

After getting unsolicited advice on how not to collapse from almost every media source out there, CNN took Larry King‘s absence last night as an opportunity to bring out the big guns, and it made for some great TV. Come step into the alternate universe where Jesse Ventura, Ron Paul and Rod Blagojevich have a TV show where they engage in civil, intelligent discussion on the tough issues facing America today.

MSNBC, 10:28amET:

Tiger Woods had a great first round of golf yesterday at the Masters – his best first round ever in the tournament. But which network’s chyron writer was going to take the bold step to make a sex joke with the news? Not Comedy Central – MSNBC.

The Masters kicks off this morning in Augusta, Georgia, and many a camera and news junkie will be tracking Tiger Woods’s first swings back into golf after a four-month self-imposed hiatus. Tiger tees off at 1:42 p.m. local time, and ESPN will be carrying at least some of his round in its afternoon broadcast.

Tiger is back! And so is his father in this strange, uncomfortable, sad, painful, and creepy new Nike ad.

About 10 minutes into Tiger Woods’ press conference at Augusta National Golf Club yesterday, I understood why Team Tiger chose that venue as the site for their man’s much-anticipated meeting with the media. As many observers have noted, the club already provides more secure surroundings — and more security — than any golf tournament in [...]

Hi, my name is Stephanie and I’m addicted to Tiger. Since November 27, I’ve been held hostage to the unfolding of Tiger’s sex scandal. No doubt Tiger messed up big time and he’s the one who has to live with his mistakes. But four-plus months later, I’m beyond over it. Honestly, I just want to watch him play golf.

By now you’ve all seen those ads for the just-released fantasy epic Clash of the Titans, with Liam Neeson as Zeus declaring from on high, “RELEASE THE KRAKEN!” The Kraken is a giant sea monster with huge tentacles and rows of razor-sharp teeth. Ooh scary, how will the hot Australian guy from Avatar defeat it? [...]