Seth Meyers and Amy Poehler are Unimpressed by the ‘Midlife Crisis’ Space Race: ‘We All Understand… The Rockets are Dicks’
Seth Meyers and Amy Poehler roasted billionaires Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson for their “midlife crisis” space race.
Meyers opened up the latest installment of his Really!?! segment on Late Night by asking if a space race through the cosmos is “really” what the two billionaires want to spend their “unprecedented fortunes and influences” on.
“And you know what Seth, I miss the old billionaires,” Poehler admitted. “The ones that wore top hats and ate caviar with their hands. Now all these new guys do is intermittent fasting and krav maga so they can dodge all those taxes.”
Poehler then noted that women are absent from the space race, as “we have to fix all the things — we have shit to do down here!”
“Is this how billionaires have a midlife crisis?” Poehler asked. “Whatever happened to buying a leather jacket and binge-watching Billions? And by the way, I think we all understand the obsession with the rockets, right? The rockets are dicks. Even [Sigmund] Freud is like, ‘You don’t need me for this, right? You get it! Those rockets are dicks.’”
Meyers went on to mock Branson for never even making it to space in the first place, as the billionaire managed to get roughly 50 miles above sea level, but didn’t pass the 62-mile mark, which generally indicates the beginning of outer space.
“You didn’t go to outer space,” he said. “You just went pretty high for a plane. You went to outer sky. I mean, really!?! You’re the astronaut equivalent of driving by your ex’s house to see if the lights were on.”
Watch above, via YouTube.
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