Ashley Judd Reflects on Her Mother’s Death and Battle With Mental Illness: ‘I Didn’t Cause it, I Couldn’t Control it, I Couldn’t Cure it’

Actress Ashely Judd is opening up about the death of her mother Naomi Judd and her longtime struggle with mental illness during a recent podcast interview.

Speaking with author David Kessler on his podcast Healing, Judd discussed the jagged road of healing and her thoughts on her mother’s struggles.

Naomi Judd, who died by suicide in April, had fought a lifelong battle with depression and anxiety. Her death came days before being inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame.

When asked about her grief journey on the podcast, Ashley Judd said, “I guess what I would like for people to know is that I had an extraordinary journey with my mom.”

After discussing her own experiences with therapy, she explained how it helped her cope with her mother’s struggles. Ashley said, “Obviously mom was someone who had a mental illness and so I needed to work a good program. I needed to understand that her mental illness was a disease.”

“I didn’t cause it, I couldn’t control it and I couldn’t cure it. I could contribute through my attitudes and my actions. There were ways in which I could be supportive. There were ways in which I could sabotage and I needed the wisdom of other people with a lot of experience to help guide me,” she added.

“There were times when she got excellent and expert professional help, and she was not to pursue that in the ways that I thought were better for her,” Judd continued. “I had to respect her autonomy and give her the dignity of making those decisions for herself. Even when I thought her thinking was distorted.”

Kessler jumped in to say, “It is easy to think ‘I know what’s right. I know what’s best.’ People have a right to do it wrong. And of course that’s my version of right and wrong, but they have their own autonomy. They have their own destiny and mental illness is a disease that does change your decision making capacity.”

“I’m not the arbiter of right and wrong, you know, and I resigned from the committee that, you know, gets to insist on, ‘You must accept my views.’ And then what that leaves me with David, is my grief and the loss of my beautiful mother and my discomfort over “What if this happens? What if that happens? What if she doesn’t stay at this medical detox? What if she doesn’t get help with this place that treats dual diagnosis? What happens if she doesn’t go to these meetings? Oh my God. Now she’s fired that person,'” Judd explained.

She concluded, “It leaves me with my feelings and my feelings are my responsibility and that’s why I need my own recovery. And the best thing that family members can do for themselves is get their own help.”

Listen above via Healing.