Nation Horrified By Poisonous Spider Found in Woman’s Ear

The entire country, or at least a good chunk of it, now wishes it could unlearn the story of the woman who thought she had some water in her ear, but found out there was actually a poisonous spider hiding out in there.

If you have yet to recoil in terror at the tale of Kansas City’s Susie Torres and her otological passenger, this is your last chance to turn back. During a doctor’s visit for a complaint of water in the ear, Torres got some harrowing news from a medical assistant. From 41 Action News:

Torres said, while she did not know exactly what was in her ear at that point, she did not panic.

“She came back in and told me it was a spider,” Torres said. “They had a few tools and worked their magic and got it out.”

Doctors later told her it was a highly venomous brown recluse spider.

Luckily for Torres, the spider did not bite her.

Since local news began reporting the story on Thursday, the tale has captured imaginations across social media, and not in a good way. While some were fascinated, others just wanted it to stop.

If you’re thinking you don’t have enough to worry about, have we got a story for you. https://t.co/KDXwLyNq1J

— Connie Schultz (@ConnieSchultz) August 24, 2019

I hereby order you all to stop tweeting about that ear spider!!

— Lauren Dezenski (@LaurenDezenski) August 23, 2019

I CURRENTLY have water in my ear and now you have me sitting in silence trying to see if I hear a spider crawling around, terrific.

— Pat Ward (@WardDPatrick) August 23, 2019

Dear doctors: If you ever discover I have a spider in my ear, please tell me AFTER YOU TAKE IT OUT, NOT BEFORE YOU TAKE IT OUT. https://t.co/5ihb68pwaX

— Michael Roston (@michaelroston) August 23, 2019

fuck!!!!!!!!!

— elizabeth bruenig (@ebruenig) August 23, 2019

Rather than curse the darkness, others lit a candle:

News you can use: "Anyone who realizes they have a bug in their ear should try to make the insect float out with warm mineral oil, olive oil or baby oil."https://t.co/hTbwjhKlEw

— David Fahrenthold (@Fahrenthold) August 23, 2019

Whatever you do, resist the natural urge to kill it with fire. Enjoy your Saturday!

Watch 41 Action News’ report above.