‘One Dick Got Another Dick Elected!’: Trevor Noah Imagines America in 2020 Under President Trump
In the opening segment of The Daily Show tonight, host Trevor Noah presented a possible vision of the United States if Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump were to win election next week.
Acting as if he was doing the broadcast from an abandoned studio in 2020 just days before the election, Noah lamented that the American voters were distracted by emails, that merely turned out to be thousands of “Antony Weiner’s dick pics,” which explained why the Washington Monument was changed to the Weiner Monument. “One dick got another dick elected,” Noah shouted.
Moving onto the media, he showed that it was now just TNN due to the “Trumpaganda forces” shutting down all other news sources. He even showed former Daily Show correspondent John Oliver getting taken away by the police while on air. According to Noah, he himself escaped because he snuck into Steve Harvey’s house and stole his mustache.
Going over more of the history since Trump was elected, Noah showed that no one was running against Trump as he faced re-election. Meanwhile, both Hillary Clinton and Mike Pence were serving out sentences in “Super Guantanamo.”
It was noted that the wall was still under construction and was only four feet tall, Obamacare had been replaced by an energy drink and Trump had been banned from Antarctica for grabbing a penguin’s pussy. And, of course, the American economy had collapsed.
After revealing that the new national anthem was just 20 minutes of lyrics complimenting Trump on his big hands and “no problem downstairs,” he ended by letting viewers know that their vote matters because “we’ve seen what four years of Donald Trump can do to a country.”
Watch the clip above, via Comedy Central.
[image via screengrab]
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