Best Presidential Ad Ever: Candidate Announces Campaign On The Simplest Of All Platforms

video

by Jon Bershad | 2:53 pm, August 4th, 2011

» 19 comments

Meet Connor Ratliff. He’s a 35 year old man from New York and last night, on live TV, he announced his candidacy for presidency of the United States of America. Unless you watch Manhattan public access, you may have missed it. Fortunately, we have his campaign ad below and it may just be the greatest presidential campaign ad since Lyndon Johnson blew up a nuclear bomb in a little girl’s eye.

Before I continue, I’ll let the man speak for himself:

And now the background. Ratliff is a New York comedian who performs at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre and is half of the filmmaking group The Lone Cornmeal Machine who contribute weekly videos to cult public access show The Chris Gethard Show (it seems odd to call something “cult” when it’s only existed for seven weeks, but this show earns it). Last night, Ratliff showed the above video and announced he was running for president. After Gethard pointed out there was very little about his actual policies in the video, Ratliff elaborated:

“The United States Constitution says very little about what it takes to be president. All it says is that you have to be born here, you have to have lived here for 14 years, and the one number they threw out there is 35; you have to be at least 35 years old. And, in the entire history of our country, know how young the youngest president has been? 42! That’s a disgrace. That’s a disgrace. Our founding fathers put one number in the Constitution, 35. That’s how old I am! Don’t you want to do what the founding fathers wanted?”

Now there’s some traditional values if I ever heard them.

Ratliff’s campaign has created an official Twitter account which is promising cabinet positions to anyone who follows it.

Hey, that’s only half as tacky as what Newt Gingrich is accused of.

campaign ads, Chris Gethard, Connor Ratliff, The Chris Gethard Show

Greg

Hope he picks Alex Jones as V.P.
Anonymous

Makes more sense than anything Sarah Palin has ever said . . . and it’s factually correct, too!
Jeffnfalzone

Please keep tracking this man’s actions for us.
Laurence Glavin

During the time of the Founding Fathers, 35 was pretty well along, because people croaked at a pretty young age. Look at (or better listen to) Mozart and Schubert, two composers who began decomposing at about that age. Economists often use the term “constant dollars”; maybe we should establish the term “constant years”. Today is President Obama’s birthday. Maybe JUST NOW he’s mature enough for the office.
Anonymous

I can tell your a smart one huh?
going after Palin maybe you can throw in by calling Bush dumb too…Even though Palin was a college grad, Mayor ,Governor and twice a successful small business owner along with being asked on a presidential ticket ….she must be dumb! To criticize someone that you dont know and can never come close in life accomplishments shows how much of a moron of a person you are.
beckslapped

Why would this guy want to desicrate the institusion of the president like this?
beckslapped

Why would this guy want to desicrate the institusion of the president like this?
Anonymous

That’s so cute! For the record, I’m pretty sure someone who doesn’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re” has no standing when it comes to defending anyone’s intellect.

I’m even going to go out on a limb here and guess that you’re a big believer in the New Testament, which by your logic would “show[s] how much of a moron of a person you are” since you don’t actually know Jesus and “can never come close in life accomplishments” to his alleged feats.

Now go outside and play in traffic while the grown-ups talk about big people stuff, ok?
Anonymous

A sly jab at the birthers and their over-obsession with the minimal Constitutional requirements for the office, perhaps?
Richdeerman

It’s spelled “desecrate.” As in “why would you want to desecrate the English language like this?”
http://www.facebook.com/people/Tymm-Conner/1052407878 Tymm Conner

Wow…He’s my hero. I am most definitely voting for him. He is, so far, the most eloquent and trustworthy candidate I’ve heard yet. He has my write-in vote if he doesn’t make the ballot.

“RATLIFF LIFFTS ME!!!” “CONNOR’S NO CON!!” “HE’S 35, FOR F***’S SAKE!!”

I like him…and he’s cute, to boot!!
http://www.facebook.com/people/Bob-Uda/1044488632 Bob Uda

This guy is way better qualified than Obama. He meets all of the Constitutional requirements including being a natural born citizen.
HawkCW4

Man I knew I should have payed attention in that dang spelling class. Since I cant play in your arrogant little world, maybe you would like to come play in mine. I hunt. I hunt Wild Boars. I hunt Wild Boars that weigh 750+ lbs. I hunt Wild Boars with only a spear. I hunt Wild Boars with only a spear, AND we do not ever get to throw the spear. I hunt Wild Boars with a spear that is only 5 ft long. Think about that just a second. 750+ lbs coming at you at 20 miles an hour and I can do nothing until he gets to 5 ft from me. Sound like fun to you. Yea I could have passed spelling and be like you, OR I could do my thing and be like me. Altho Im not welcome in your world, You can come hunt with me any time.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Carrie-Taranova/1142207564 Carrie Taranova

At least he is more qualified legally then the 50 year old Kenyan who does not qualify on any level.
Gopsuxmyleftnut

Funny joke u stinky snatch nazi cock sucking white whore!!
Anonymous

I don’t know exactly when he was born (and can’t be bothered to research it) but if he’s 35 now, that means he’s got to be at least 36 by the time the election rolls around, and somewhere between 36.5 and 37 by the time he takes office. If I’m voting for the his party, I’m going to want a candidate who is 35 when he takes office, and not a day older.

Anyway, I don’t believe nothin’ till I see a birf certificate.
Bcarlton

Well done…Age was also all Obama had to offer when he was parachuted into the Democrat Primaries… so it can happen for Ratliff too eh?
Dave

The Founding Fathers themselves lived to quite old ages, which means 35 could be just as relevant today. George Washington: 67, Thomas Jefferson: 83, John Adams: 90, James Madison: 85, Ben Franklin: 84, John Jay: 83, Benjamin Rush: 67, and James Monroe: 73
Richdeerman

HawkCW4,

I am a hunter (they don’t call me “deerman” for nothing) as well as a speller! I am also a walker and a gum chewer, and can do both at once while killing a wild boar AND knowing how to read and write correctly. Why limit yourself? You can do it all, Hawk! Don’t give in to the tyranny of false choices!