Late Night Round Up: Meyers, Colbert, Kimmel, Fallon Tackle Mattis vs. Trump and the Nationwide Protests
Seth Meyers, Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel, and Jimmy Fallon addressed former Secretary of Defense Jim Mattis’ criticism of the president, Donald Trump’s reaction, and the continued protests across the nation on their late night shows Thursday.
“The nationwide protests over George Floyd’s murder have been incredibly successful in swaying public opinion, and now even military leaders are speaking out against the president’s attempts to suppress them,” Meyers said before reminding listeners that Trump has threatened military force on protesters several times.
Meyers noted that Mattis criticized Trump for using U.S. troops to violate the rights of citizens in order to take a picture in front of a church, showing his support for peaceful protests.
“We must reject and hold accountable those in office who would make a mockery of our Constitution,” Mattis said of the Bible stunt. Trump then shot back on Twitter, claiming that he had fired Mattis and that given him the nickname “Mad Dog.”
“OK, first of all, he resigned, you didn’t fire him,” Meyers pointed out. “Second, you didn’t come up with the name ‘Mad Dog’ — he’s had it since at least 2004 and we know you didn’t come up with it because it’s a cool nickname and your nicknames suck. Sorry. Sorry, dude. If you come up with a nickname for him, it would have been something like ‘Lame James’ or ‘Jumpin’ Jim.’”
Meyers then addressed polls that show most Americans believe the anger displayed during these protests is justified and that they understand and sympathize with those demonstrating.
The host noted that despite being nonviolent, police officers are using force against peaceful protesters, and revealed that one officer caught on tape shoving a protester had 79 complaints made towards him in the past three years.
“No other job works like that,” he noted, “If a commercial airline pilot had been investigated 79 times for flying upside down and doing barrel rolls while hammered on Goldschlager, we wouldn’t be like, ‘alright man, 80 strikes and you’re out.'”
Colbert also went after the police tactics used against protesters nationwide and noted that there are marches occurring in at least 430 American cities and towns.
“Please don’t buy the false narrative that these are lawless mobs,” Colbert said. “The vast majority of these protests have been peaceful. You might not know that if you watch cable news, because to the news, peace is boring. That’s why CNN just launched their sister network: The Burning Crashcan Channel.”
Colbert continued to go after police for using brutal tactics to enforce curfews, adding that it was just an excuse to be violent before he showed a video of an NYPD officer hitting a biker on his way home.
“All the bars in New York are closed,” Colbert pointed out. “Why do cops get to go clubbing?”
Colbert then addressed Mattis’ comments on Trump’s leadership:
“Mattis added that ‘We must not be distracted by a small number of lawbreakers. The protests are defined by tens of thousands of people of conscience who are insisting that we live up to our values — our values as people and our values as a nation.’ That is a stirring message of compassion, unity, and reason from — Mad Dog? I hereby rename you ‘Principled Pooch.’” Colbert
Kimmel went after Trump for lying and taking credit for Mattis’ nickname “Mad Dog,” and compared his stunt to the plot-line from a 1990s comedy.
“What a strange thing to lie about. It’s so easily disproved,” Kimmel said. “Remember the movie Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion, where they lie and say they invented Post-it notes? It’s like that, but from the president.”
Kimmel also bashed Trump’s treatment of peaceful protesters and his decision to build another fence around the White House to defend himself from protesters.
“Authorities there are busy erecting another fence that will go around the existing White House fence, which will make two fences, which I think was a Spin Doctors song,” Kimmel joked. “So it looks like Trump is finally getting his wall built after all. How long before we find out Don Jr. invested in a fence company?”
Fallon also joked about the new White House fence, pointing out that it was a weird tactic for a president who is constantly trying to prove he isn’t divisive.
Like Kimmel, Fallon also referenced a classic 90s movie during his monologue and compared Trump to Kevin McCallister from Home Alone.
“Yep, Trump is trying to protect the White House,” Fallon said. “He even ran around putting broken Christmas ornaments under windows and tying rope to paint cans to swing over the staircase.”
Watch above, via Youtube.
Have a tip we should know? firstname.lastname@example.org