Alexandra Petri is the Most Hysterical Columnist On the Internet — Here Are Her 10 Best Tweets

New York Times contributor Lindy West once quipped that Twitter was only good for  “trolls, robots and dictators.” That bleak assessment is incorrect, however, since it ignores another — generally more uplifting — and in a class entirely alone: Alexandra Petri.

Petri snagged her own column at the Washington Post in 2010, and has been making us laugh with her devastatingly insightful writing ever since.

Choosing our ten favorite Petri tweets was no easy feat and while this list is by no means definitive, we hope it will be a nice guide for the uninitiated and the very initiated alike.

On White House purges

does Donald Trump genuinely think he is supposed to eliminate someone each week

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) July 28, 2017

On the death of Roger Ailes

skirts at Fox News today will be lowered to half-mast

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) May 18, 2017

Flipping the script

from Jabba the Hutt’s perspective Star Wars is the story of a guy who owed him money and then instead of paying had his friends murder him

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) August 29, 2016

On Stephen Miller

look the original constitution was just a blank page
-Stephen Miller soon probably

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) August 2, 2017

On GOP Senators 

I Did Not Like It One Bit When The President Stabbed That Little Girl In The Leg, commented one senator on his way to vote against trees

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) June 29, 2017

On victim blaming 

Crucified Man Had Had Prior Run-Ins With Local Authorities

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) April 11, 2017

On Trump-Hillary debates 

finally the whole country will watch as a woman stands politely listening to a loud man’s bad ideas about the field she spent her life in

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) September 26, 2016

On that Chris Christie hostage situation 

chris christie looks like he’s seen a ghost and that ghost has forced him to watch mufasa die https://t.co/9nSHKlilSO

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) March 2, 2016

On Trump’s consistent obsession with Hillary Clinton

sometimes I think donald trump is the only person living in that alternative universe where Hillary Clinton is president

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) July 10, 2017

On “the woman card”

i love the woman card
carry it with you and it entitles you to 21% off your income anywhere you go

— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) April 27, 2016

… Don’t ever change.

[image via screengrab]