Evgeni Plushenko Awards Himself “Platinum” Medal in Vancouver

Not that there was any doubt that men’s figure skating silver medalist Evgeni Plushenko was in the running for worst sportsman of the 2012 Olympic Games before, but Plushenko, always the fierce competitor, has taken his unique ability to alter reality to new heights with his latest online antics. It seems the reason he has kept quiet in the past days, after spending a good amount of last week trashing gold medalist Evan Lysacek for not being able to perform a quadruple jump (“It’s not men’s figure skating… it’s dancing”), is that he has convinced himself that he didn’t lose a gold medal– he won a platinum one.

Yes, Plushenko is so certain that he was robbed of his championship by the great American beacon of masculinity that he has overridden Olympic tradition and awarded himself a non-existent platinum medal on his website. The graphic, clearly a scan of a regular Vancouver silver, is unconvincing at best, but at least his countrymen appear to back him in asserting his dominance. Prime Minister Vladimir Putin told Plushenko his “silver is worth gold,” and Russian television originally presented him with his platinum medal, with RTR host Alexei Popov telling him, “You already have one gold and one silver so here’s a platinum medal for you… You are the real champion.”

“What’s next?” Plushenko’s website coyly asks – with a link to the site for the 2014 Olympic games. What should come next is an apology to Lysacek and the Olympic committee for exhibiting such complete lack of respect for the Olympic games, his competitor, and the sport of figure skating in general, but let’s not hold our breath. Instead, while we’re at it, let’s hope Plushenko continues his faux-Olympic medal ceremonies and awards a fox fur and glitter one to the skater that actually did get robbed of a well-deserved bronze, Lysacek’s longtime rival and admitted russophile Johnny Weir. If Plushenko’s intent is to spite Lysacek as much as possible, there would be no better way.