Billy Eichner is certainly not for everyone. Whereas shows like Cash Cab pretend to give random people on the street the chance to win money (I’m sorry, did I just disillusion you?), Eichner’s style is to actually just run up to people and start screaming at them like a crazy person. On his Fuse game show, Billy on the Street, you can see him harassing poor pedestrians with questions like “True or false, Zac Efron looks like he wants to be molested by an older person?” Clearly, this is the kind of thing that viewers will either hate or find laugh out loud hilarious. For those of you lucky enough to fall in the latter category, Eichner’s appearance last night on Conan is an almost too perfect heightening of this idea.

It is the biggest secular holiday of the year, so naturally much of today’s The Five revolved around last night’s Super Bowl events. The crew particularly stopped on the first case of indecent conduct during the Halftime Show since Janet Jackson exposed her breast to America: British/Sri Lankan rapper M.I.A. giving the finger to the camera, as she does in the music video for the song being performed, “Give Me All Your Lovin’.” Most found it vulgar on its face, but Dana Perino objected not to the gesture but to M.I.A.’s presence at all: why would Madonna perform with a rapper who was “not even an American?”

Millions of football fans were transfixed by a Will Ferrell look-alike who stole the show at last night’s Super Bowl halftime performance by Madonna. Rocking a stunningly primal hairdo, the toga-adorn man performed a serious of death-defying stunts. He deftly leapt through the air, while gracefully balancing himself on a trapeze to the beat of the Material Girl’s song “Music” and wowed the crowd with an epic backflip.

There are so many different aspects of Madonna’s Super Bowl halftime performance that make it noteworthy: The fact that she looks as good in her 50′s as she did in her 20′s performing the same songs…

This week, thanks to an interview with Suze Orman, Piers Morgan Tonight hit 266,000 in the 25-54 year old demo, which put him in second place in the time slot Wednesday night, his highest in months. That means it’s time to celebrate. And, if you know Piers Morgan, you know what kind of celebration he’d choose; it’s time for some Twitter snarking!

With a complete lack of shock, I can report that tonight’s Golden Globes hasn’t been particularly exciting. Sure, there have been a few funny moments, like Ricky Gervais’ monologue, William H. Macy and Felicity Huffman’s duet, and Jessica Lange’s claim that American Horror Story is “beautifully written” (ha!), but there haven’t been too many notable moments. With that being said, one notable exchange occurred between host Gervais and presenter (as well as winner!) Madonna. After Gervais made a joke about how “like a virgin” Madonna is these days, the multi-hyphenate hit back as only Madonna can.

In case you haven’t heard (and, unless you also spend your days slowly wandering the winding, darkened halls of the Internet, there’s no real reason you should have), Madonna had a pretty cruddy time at the Venice Film Festival. First, the reaction to her film, W.E., was…not great. Then there was the whole hydrangeas incident as video seemed to catch the star rudely trashing the present some fan stupidly gave her (a true fan knows an artist’s plant tastes, duh!). That video soon became a fairly large Internet meme. Large enough, at least, that Madonna has felt the need to respond, doing so in typical Madonna fashion.

Well, not entirely typical. There are no phony accents involved.

We see a lot of Internet videos in the day. Sue us. After watching cable news for four hours straight, sometimes we just want to watch a cat ride a skate board. Anyway, most of those videos we keep to ourselves as they don’t really fall into the purview of what the site is. Other times, however, it’s Friday. And, really, what’s Friday if not for enjoying a 20 year old video of a nine-year-old’s fully choreographed, epic ode to Madonna’s “Vogue?”

So, that big Madonna interview nobody was expecting on CNN’s new Piers Morgan Tonight? Yeah, well it’s off.

The man set to replace Larry King in January, has told UK paper the Express that guests will veer closer to Barack Obama than the Material Girl. In fact, Piers Morgan says she should consider herself banned:

It’s hard not to love Neil Patrick Harris. And it’s nice that he and his partner David Burtka are going to be daddies to twins. But if you want the media to respect your privacy, maybe Twitter isn’t the best place to announce the news.

Glee managed to land itself in the O’Reilly cable sphere last night after the guidance counselor character on the show, bemoaning the lack of positive female role models for young women these days, name-checks Ann Coulter as one. I think you can probably see where this is going.

So, this was probably inevitable. Sandy Rios, Fox news contributor and president of the Culture Campaign (the name alone should send some warning signals) told Megyn Kelly that she thinks Lady Gaga’s latest (jaw-droppingly awesome) video “Telephone” featuring Beyonce should be banned from MTV. Three guesses why.

Right now, on umpteen channels across the dial — ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox, CNN, MTV, VH1, BET, HBO, PBS, TNT, Showtime, Comedy Central, Bravo, E!, Oxygen, Current and more — plus scores of websites via embeddable livestreams, the “Hope for Haiti Now” telethon is sending the message to a battered nation that the world cares, and will help. Donate at HopeForHaitiNow.org or text “GIVE” to 50555.

Esquire, Fortune, Playboy, Vanity Fair, New York: End the War on Christmas Magazine Covers! Who knows, magazines might even increase those newsstand sell-through numbers that are all doing so terribly if they just get back into the holiday spirit. To make a case, we’ve collected the Top 20 Christmas Magazine Covers of All Time.

Sometimes, even the paparazzi lose: British newspaper The Mail has paid damages to Madonna for taking unauthorized pictures of her wedding with Guy Ritchie in 2000.

David Letterman’s disclosure last night that he was being extorted for $2 million over the fact he’d had sex with women who’d worked for him made for was some serious must-see TV. Also, hello ratings! But it’s certainly not the first time Letterman has grabbed the morning after spotlight due to shocking behavior. Here’s a look at our Top Ten Most Shocking Late Night Moments.