Bin Laden Hunter Gary Brooks Faulkner Vows A Return To Pakistan, Hires Blago’s PR Team

Gary Brooks Faulkner– the 52-year-old construction worker who took it upon himself to find and kill Osama Bin Laden armed with only a 40-inch sword, a dagger, a small gun, and night vision goggles– is vowing to return to his mission. Faulkner says he’s “absolutely” going back to the Afghanistan/Pakistan border to finish the job, but this time he’s got a formidable media army behind him: Rod Blagojevich‘s PR team.

The Publicity Agency, a PR firm lead by founding publicist Glenn Selig, announced last night that they are handling all media inquiries for Faulkner from now on. Selig and company are the people responsible for putting Blagojevich on every major news program last year and landing him gigs on I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! and Celebrity Apprentice. It’s Selig’s work at getting Blagojevich’s bumbling charm out there that makes defense attorney Sam Adam Jr.’s tactic of getting Blagojevich out of trouble by proving he is too much of a “celebrity idiot” to be corrupt even remotely plausible.

It’s still unclear how Selig will proceed with Faulkner, a character who, despite bringing up several questions of sanity, has a lot going for him in terms of public opinion: how can you not admire a man single-handedly taking on the head of Al-Qaeda with a giant sword? But one thing’s for certain: now that Faulkner is back in America, he’s open to talking to the press. AP reports that he has already asserted he will “absolutely” return to the Middle East to finish his mission and ominously hinted that “you’ll find out at the end of August.”

Fox News reported his most recent statements to the press, where he gives even more cryptic indications that his plan, despite his arrival back in the US, is still underway:

“There’s a lot of people I have to protect, also. Because it’s not about me. we’ve got some brothers and sisters that are americans, that need some help, too, so, you know, we have a joint thing going on, and we’ve got to protect our own. But I’ve got a funny feeling that someone is going down very shortly, here, so, uh, and it’s not us.”

The Fox News report below:

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